The Beautiful Answer

Expansion

I suppose it’s no accident on a day when we had a significant Jupiter transit that I (and maybe you, too) experienced some major expansiveness. Jupiter is the luckiest planet in the zodiac, and when other planets aspect it, or hit our own natal Jupiter’s position, chances are we’re expanding our influence (hopefully not our waistlines), getting a promotion, enjoying a sense of wellbeing — you get the drill. They’re just days when nothing can go wrong, and you’re kind of walking around on air, not expecting the other shoe to drop. Because it’s fabulous, and it’s already on your foot. 

Today was like that for me. As I’ve written before, I’ve got a lot on my plate these days, with a recent book launch, meetings about future writing projects, plans for a book tour this summer, existing clients and lots of new clients as well. Oh, and I’ve got a play opening in three days from now. So if you’re in the Baltimore/Washington, D.C. area, go see Punk Rock Mom at the Venus Theatre. So I’m not looking for expansion as in “‘let’s find a few more things for me to do.” 

Ironically, it came looking for me in another way. I had a few clients, then a few meetings, and then a few more clients kind of bookending my day. I always like to leave my work behind this way, because the energy of my sessions stays with me, and I feel like I’ve spent my time well, helping people. When I looked back at my day today, it was as if some snake charmer had orchestrated it. It was just so graceful and easy, not stressful or forced in any way.  And I wondered how that had happened, when no one seemed to be the planner — except for maybe Jupiter. 

Thank you, Jupiter, for making my life an easier place to be, and helping me experience expansion as so many things are going right. Since it’s Beltane, I’ve left out some almonds and cookies for the fairies, in the hopes they’ll grant my wishes. 

Heal!

You know those old images of televangelists, who hold their hands in the air and say HEAL! really loudly, sometimes knocking someone in the head until they fly backward, or stumble into the aisle? I haven’t been to enough tent revival meetings to know how true this is (or isn’t), but that’s pretty much how I felt today. 

No, life didn’t hand me one of those grudgingly learned lessons, or humble me into a new belief. It didn’t ask me to go to an embarrassing mental place in order to grow and change. 

For small things, I can be very grateful. 

What it did is sneak up on me. It’s been a very busy few months for me, preparing for a book launch, attend a lot of meetings, doing book marketing and even getting ready for a play to be staged and marketed in Baltimore (where I don’t live). In times like these, time is flying by so fast, and you’re forgetting to eat or sleep much, that it’s easy to lose sight of the long-term plans to stay centered and focused. 

Today, since things slowed down a bit (my book cracked the top 100 books in all of Amazon, in both the paperback and e-book versions — not bad for the little book that could!). I was sitting at my desk just allowing my mind to drift a little, which feels wildly luxurious these days. I’ve been wanting to start writing on a new project, but my mind didn’t want to go there. So I let it wander. 

And it showed me where I’d been this time last year, and then the year before that. It went back three years, then four, and then five. It was moving so quickly, I didn’t have much time to react. All I saw was a kind of backwards time-lapse photography, where I was being shown where I had come from, and where I was now, and how much progress I had made, not just in terms of accomplishments, but of healing. I had left behind old ideas that limited who and what I could become, and old relationships that no longer served me. Part of me had even left behind the idea of having to get anywhere, so much so that just to reach out for something, or the idea of something, got me closer than I have ever been to being the person I’ve always wanted to be. 

Love Bunch

When you’re approaching a deadline of any kind, time seems to contract somehow, becoming telescoped and ever emphasized. I have a client who’s waiting for her first child to be born, and she tells me that every day seems like it’s twice as long, so fierce is her desire to see her baby’s face for the first time, and hold the little one in her arms. I have another client that’s waiting to hear back on what could become the defining moment of his life — an audition for a big part on Broadway. Either way, these are big deal moments. 

I, of course, have my own version of this coming up on Tuesday. I’ve been guided to step back from work a bit, to prepare myself for this moment but also so I can have the time and emotional space to enjoy it. For myself and clients alike, I’ve noticed the tendency to rush past these moments, thinking them not important enough to celebrate since they’re not “there” — wherever “there” might be. 

This one I fully intend to celebrate, with champagne and cupcakes. I’ve got some great joint venture partners offering free meditations, e-books and discounts of all kinds, so there’s plenty of incentive to buy the book on April 24th. The value of the incentives far outpaces the price of a paperback.

I’m just happy to have made it to this milestone in my life, and to extend the bunches of love I feel for everyone around me now. This shit is truly infectious when you work it. 

And Away We Go

When you’re approaching a big deadline in life, you can go two ways, I’ve found. One is to ball up into the fetal position and rock bak and forth in bed, wondering why you ever had the idea to write that book, or stage that play, or record that song. The other is to try your best to surf the energy of the moment, bypassing any crazy things like sleep or, in many moments, food and proper hydration. 

The latter brings about better balance, and maybe stronger mental health. The former results in, well, better rest, I suppose, as long as you can sleep while fetal. The reason I’m thinking about this, I’m sure has to do with the fact that I have a book coming out in 9 days. I’m not scared. Hell, I’ve been in this position two other times. I’m not exactly blase, either. That just smacks of a kind of arrogance I hope I never feel. I’m somewhere in the middle, even though there are times when the gravity of this moment of my life sneaks up on my and pounds me down to the ground.

It’s in those moments that I find the best stuff to work with. Today I found a morsel of fear connected all the way back to high school, and released that shit for good. I found a pocket of anticipation, and a wee bit of anxiety and, yes, even some anger that had been held back for so long I couldn’t even trace it back to its source. Gone, gone and gone. Thanks for playing.  Don’t need you anymore. 

Releasing all this old stuff in preparation for my book launch was so fun I was releasing negative thought patterns on the treadmill, and kicking old beliefs to the curb in Trader Joe’s. And even when a woman almost ran over my foot with her shopping cart, I was able to laugh and get out of the way, thanking whatever force gave me these reflexes and this indelibly powerful will to live. Not just live. Thrive. 

A Curious Thing

There’s a curious thing that happens whenever you put out a book. A kind of compression of time and space, until you’re living inside yourself, of course (I suppose it’s hard to get out of that responsibility) and living outside yourself as well, seeing what your work does to other people. You begin to see yourself through other people’s eyes. 

The book that’s coming out in 19 days, for me, is my third, but each experience has been really different. The first was an enormous learning curve, where I did just about everything wrong, and nearly drove myself insane with all the expectations. The second was more relaxed. I let it come to me, and it did, in a larger way. It became an Amazon bestseller for around three months, which was nice. The third is … well, it’s still happening. I’m doing a lot more for it, in a much more concerted way, and I’m reaching a lot more people as well. Chalk that up to all the learning experiences I’ve had in the past, or just a realistic set of expectations, I don’t know. I’m just happy I’m not tempted to tear my hair out anytime soon. 

So many people I run into want to write books. They tell me that, and then in the next sentence say something like they don’t have the time, and they don’t know what they’d write, or they’re not sure if they’d be any good at it. Setting aside the “good at it” part (everyone sucks at first, trust me), I don’t know why anyone would want to write a book unless one were burning its way out of you from the inside. Writing books is hard. It takes time, and patience, and perseverance. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. You have to see inside people’s heads, which can get exhausting, and even miss out on the fun stuff of life, like seeing your friends as often as you’d like. Writing can be painful if you’re doing it right, and it can be transcendent. 

For right now, I’m happy to rest in the “done with this one” feeling. The marketing will keep happening, as well as the reading in public and the teaching of workshops. I’ve got a few new things sketched out or outlined on my computer, a few books and plays, and we’ll see how long I can go without diving in again. For me, writing is necessary to balance out the part of my life I live for other people — the healing, compassionate part that needs to do those thing, just as my fingers ache to be on the keyboard again, after too much time alone. 

Sallie Felton’s Book Launch!

My friend Sallie Felton’s releasing a really interesting book tomorrow on Amazon, and I wanted to write a little about it this evening. The book is called Why Can’t I Get Rid of This Clutter? and it’s not just to figure out why you’re a slob. I’m kidding, of course. It’s about how our minds are always spinning around, stressing out about the past and projecting into the future, until we’re overwhelmed and unhappy, not to mention unproductive and procrastinating about what’s really important in life. 

I’ve known Sallie for a few years now, ever since she had me on her radio show to promote my second book. She’s warm, genuine and, most of all, no-bull. Her book is pretty much the same way, providing concrete tools to get started on releasing negative beliefs, and tools (practical, feeling and motivational) to start clearing away all that mental and emotional clutter, so you can find your way to your divine, inspired purpose.  From there, you’re freer to achieve your highest goals and aspirations in life — and isn’t that what we all want? 

Best of all, if you buy the book on launch day — tomorrow, March 21st — you get over $10,000 in bonus gifts, including a pretty nice discount from me on my distance energy healing sessions. There are books, e-books, MP3s, courses, coaching, discounts — hey, I’m gonna have to get this book myself! 

Anyway, just wanted to let you know about Sallie’s amazing book. If it sounds interesting to you, check it out. The value of the bonuses more than makes up for the cover price, and you’ll be doing a pretty cool lady a favor in the process. And as we all know, what does around comes around, and maybe something great will come your way as well.